Mark's Blog

I have been reading Martin Seligman and others (see especially Nicky Marone, What’s Stopping You) on the subject of learned helplessness.

This is the idea that some problems like procrastination and shyness result from a perceived absence of control over the outcome of a situation.

This poor sense of control can develop if one seeks to rectify a condition like procrastination, for example, but fails over and over. Then the next opportunity for taking initiative may be spurned as one feels victimized by a history of failure.

The individual may feel helpless about controlling his own conduct and retreat into paralysis and a sense of futility.

In Seligman’s work, the difference between helpless and mastery orientations is that those who felt weak became so distracted by attempting to account for their lack of initiative that they spend more time explaining why they failed then attempting to correct their errors and their performance subsequently suffered.

An individual's attributional style or explanatory style was also the key to understanding why people responded differently to adverse events

The pessimistic explanatory style—which sees negative events as permanent ("it will never change"), personal ("it's my fault"), and pervasive ("I can't do anything correctly")—are most likely to suffer from learned helplessness and depression (Peterson, Maier, & Seligman 1993). Cognitive behavioral therapy, heavily endorsed by Seligman, can help people to learn more realistic explanatory styles, and can help ease depression, procrastination, and social anxiety.

One other perspective on dealing with learned helplessness is offered by Marone which is to focus on the sub self she terms the Witness. This self observes and corrects but does not judge or condemn.

The witness self can see when a strategy isn’t working and can change course without interpreting things as a personal flaw. This sub self is to be distinquished from the inner critic that is more likely to block you with “yes, but” thinking, evolving into endless rationalizing about why avoidance is better than engagement.

Procrastination and unwarranted anxiety around others can be fruitfully understood as instances of learned helplessness. An acceptance of this understanding should lead to better self control.

The key is whether you have a catalyst, a big motivator or driver to move you forward. The two drivers I have found most useful are shame (that is, the AVOIDANCE of shame at feckless attempts to change) and self respect.

And, based on the understanding, you need a solution you can truly believe is going to be effective if you keep at it. What that solution is for you is probably best determined by trial and error for your own experience as to what works is the most powerful enabler.

Mark's Blog